I am apart of a mainly female forum and daily there is a topic about lightskin darkskin. Ladies wanting to bleach their skin to be more acceptable. Darkskin bashing/lightskin bashing. I dont get it. It's so sad to me.

Question of the day is (**VIEW VIDEO**) Have you ever met someone who initially seemed cool, only to have them flip the script and become entirely too aggressive? And then when you tried to create some space, they tried even harder? Well on today’s episode of Fly Guy TV, we deal with that very topic. After watching the episode, share your own “get the point” dating stories.

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This feeling is indescribable. No, I take that back…it’s borderline magical.
That’s how good it feels to be around this person. You can’t stop thinking about them.
They consume every part of your being. There’s just one problem though.
The other person doesn’t see it. In fact, it’s even worse than that.

They view you as “just a friend.”

That’s right. You’ve officially become trapped in the friend zone…a place
more unpleasant than a Ben Affleck acting workshop. Now, there was a
point in time when escaping the friend zone was considered virtually impossible…
that is until today.

It’s time for me to set the captives free with my “Fly Guide to Escaping the Friend Zone.”


1. Stop Acting Like A Friend

An effective way to begin your great escape is to stop acting like a friend.
Now that doesn’t give you permission to blatantly ignore the things that made
you friends in the first place. But it does give you the right to distance yourself
from the normal “buddy activities.”
In short, you have to avoid comments like this: “You’re such a good friend.
I feel like I can tell you anything.” If that anything doesn’t include the two
of you laying on a beach listening to Marvin Gaye’s “Sexual Healing,” then
you don’t need to hear it.


2. Rock The Boat

Still wondering how you ever found your way into the friend zone
in the first place? Well for starters, you may have been too predictable.
Here’s the test. If they were sad, did you instantly give them a shoulder to cry on?
Or how about this one: If they needed you, did you show up knocking on their
door in 3.4 seconds? If so, then you’re actually suffering from an acute
case of “predictablilititis” (I actually borrowed that word from the Jesse Jackson
“Make It Up As I Go” Public Speaking Dictionary.)
Listen, I respect your undying devotion to them, but all this does is place
you even deeper into the friend zone. Let’s break this down some more.
When a person’s in a relationship, they reach out to their mate. When they’re single,
they reach out to family and friends. Need I say more? So the next time they
say they’re bored and are wondering what you’re doing, shake things up a bit by saying you have a date. More on this next…

3. Pursue Other People

You don’t have to adjust your monitor, as this is not a misprint. You need
to start pursuing other people…today. By doing so, you actually gain ground
in the long run by triggering their jealousy switch. Think about it. Have you
ever had someone constantly running behind you, only to watch them make a
sudden about face to pursue someone else? When it happened, didn’t you secretly think,
“Am I missing out on something good?”
Jealousy is a natural emotion, and as soon as you’re able to use that to your
advantage, the sooner you’ll have them craving you more than George Bush
does higher gas prices. (Hey, you didn’t hear that from me.)

4. Get A Little Closer
The next step in escaping the friend zone is to break down the physical
barriers between the two of you. Simply put, you have to develop a pattern
of touching them. So any chance that presents itself, initiate some
type of physical contact. This can include kisses on the cheek, hugs,
and playful wrestling. The more you do this; the more comfortable they’ll be with
your touch…which is probably what Michael Vick’s cellmate is banking on.


5. Peak Their Interest

Now that you’ve broken the physical barrier, it’s time to add some intrigue
into the equation. The first step is to start sending mixed signals about your
actual feelings for them. (If you’re unclear on how to do this, pay attention
to Lindsay Lohan’s relationship with designer drugs…one day she loves them;
the next day she’s over them.)
Mixing this type of mysterious behavior with your new found physicality
only raises more questions in their mind. For starters, they’re trying to
figure out if you’re actually interested in them. This uncertainty forces them to
think about you within the context of a relationship. Mission accomplished…well almost.


6. Close The Deal
You’ve now come to the moment of truth; the juncture that ultimately separates
the men from the boys and the women from Rosie O’Donnell. If you’ve followed
my plan precisely, you should now be ready to close the deal. This happens by
cutting through the fluff, and making your intentions abundantly clear. There’s
no clear cut way to go about expressing yourself, but one constant must be
in place no matter what the approach: The two of you must be alone.
Once the mood is right, grab them by the shoulders, and let them know exactly how you feel…preferably in 3-5 sentences (There’s nothing worse than killing the mood by
talking too much. Wrap it up

The Fly Guy Moral: Before you attempt to break out of the friend zone, you
need to ask yourself this final question: Am I even going to enjoy this new found freedom?
Let’s face it, many times there’s only one thing that’s actually better than being
in a relationship with someone…and that’s the fantasy of it. In the end, you may
find out that it’s not all that’s cracked up to be. So before you throw away
your friendship, make sure you’re ready to accept the consequences, no
matter what the outcome.

Good luck. And remember, if you get caught during your escape: Don’t snitch on me.

Question Of The Day Is

Is America Really ready for a Afro-American President, what is your
stance on this issue ? Are you voting for change or are you voting based
upon race & who is really has the better political agenda Obama or
McCain

HE WALKS IN WITH A BACKPACK FULL OF MONEY. I THINK HE'S THROWING OUT TWENTIES. EVEN DUDES ARE REACHING FOR THIS DOE. LOL WOW........

The writing had been on the wall for quite some time now. You just refused to read it.
Why? Because as far as you were concerned, you had found the man of your dreams,
and there was nothing anyone could say or do to change that. There was however,
one slight problem … The feeling wasn’t mutual.

If only you would have paid attention to my “Top 5 Signs That He’s Not Interested”
… perhaps this could have all been avoided.

1. He never calls first.

Do me a favor and check how many times you’ve called him over the past
two weeks. Once you’ve written that number down, compare it to the number
of times he’s called you during that same period.

Big difference?

Listen, when you’re the one that calls first … every single time … what he’s actually
showing you is that he’s about as interested in you as Naomi Campbell is in
attending anger management classes.

2. He never attempts to make any plans with you.

Another indicator that he’s not interested in you can be found in how aggressively
he tries to make plans with you. Does he immediately come to the table with the
“who, what, when, where, and why” of a romantic night out? Or does he talk about
seeing you in terms that are about as vague as Al Sharpton’s job description?
(After all these years, I still don’t know what he does.)

Side Bar: Late night calls asking you to “come over and watch this movie with me,” don’t exactly equate to him making legitimate plans.

3. He constantly cancels the date at the last minute.

You look beautiful tonight. In fact, you always do on date night. But shortly before
it’s time for you to meet, the phone rings. It’s him on the other end, beginning
the same conversation you’ve heard many times before …

“Hey I’m sorry, but my job is making me work late again.
My boss always seems to find a way to keep us apart.”

Fly Guy Translation: “I really don’t feel like going out with you tonight.
Plus, I forgot the game was about to come on, so I had to weigh my options.
Let’s see: spending money on you … watching the game …
spending money on you … watching the game. I think we both know who won that battle.”

4. He becomes a master magician (now you see me, now you don’t.)

In the beginning, the two of you would speak several times a day …
kind of like Kevin Federline and The Unemployment Office. And just when
you thought something positive was about to happen, he up and disappeared …
kind of like Kevin Federline and The Unemployment Office.

In fact, you were THIS close to giving up on him; then conveniently,
he reappeared. Of course, he apologized and gave his word that it would
never happen again. But it did, and the cycle continued … kind of like Kevin Federline
and … well you get the point.

5. He begins to point out your differences.

A rather obvious sign that he’s not interested is when he starts pointing
out your differences … no matter how random or how insignificant they may be.
Maybe you like to argue and he doesn’t. Perhaps you’re a Democrat
and he’s a Republican. Or maybe you like fried fish but he prefers baked …
Doritos to his Sun Chips … Colgate to his Crest … Connect Four to his Battleship …
Should I go on?

Here’s the bottom line. By highlighting your differences, what he’s really
trying to say is this: “We aren’t made for each other.”

The Fly Conclusion: So now that you know the truth, what’s next? Will
you continue to hold out hope that he will one day change his mind and
make you the love of his life? Or will you gracefully walk away, and avoid
being labeled as the “crazy chick that just doesn’t get it.”

I pray you choose the latter.

Question Of The Day Is

Would you give a person who has a record ( Been in jail) an
opportunity to be in a serious relationship

This question comes from one of the female readers on my email forum.....

Question Of The Day Is

What happen to romance in a relationship? Why after the relationship is established, the romance stops and the relationship becomes routine???

Question Of The Day Is

Why are so many black women infatuated w/ finding their so called "black king"
in order to start a meaningful relationship and or family?
What is the preconceived notion about this way of thinking?

The body of a woman, who had been missing since attending Lil' Kim's birthday party on Sunday night, was found yesterday on the roof of the building where the party took place. Cops say the body of Ingrid Rivera, 24 years of age, was found on the roof inside a utility closet of Spotlight Live, a popular club in the middle of Times Square yesterday. She had suffered a head wound and other injuries. She was last seen by her friends arguing with the bouncers of the club. Story Developing . . . Courtesy of CW News and TMZ.com

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In case you missed it, last week's edition of the Fly Guy Chronicles detailed the essential keys to being a great girlfriend.
And while that column sparked a spirited debate, I still feel there's more to be said. So as promised, I've compiled a list of traits that define
a great boyfriend. While there's no set formula to how one defines greatness, there are a few traits that remain universal to all men.
With that being said, here are the Fly Guy's 5 Keys To Being A Great Boyfriend.


1. He Listens
Every man thinks he knows how to be a great listener. But such an assertion is perhaps more off base than R. Kelly's belief that 14 is the new 21.
A great listener does more than just quietly sit by while his woman pours her heart out. Instead, he actively participates in the conversation by asking questions,
and showing a genuine interest in the topic. You know what this says?
It says that he cares and finds her interesting—which are two things that
most women consider important.

2. He Pays Attention to the Little Things
From noticing that she got her hair done, to pointing out the fact that she's dropped a few pounds, nothing screams great boyfriend like a man who
automatically notices the little things. It shows that he's paying attention, and is in tune to what's going on in her life. By exhibiting such a positive trait,
his girlfriend will wind up loving him more than Diddy loves …well, Diddy.

3. He Trusts Her
A great boyfriend realizes that no woman wants to be suffocated due to a lack of trust. Once he provides her with ample space to live her life,
and ceases to interrogate her about as often as I question Blanket actually being Michael Jackson's child, then she'll begin to realize
that she's uncovered a valuable commodity. A trusting man.

4. He Challenges Her To Better Herself
A great boyfriend strives to inspire his girlfriend. By taking on the role of number #1 cheerleader, he pushes her to accomplish things that
might have otherwise fallen by the wayside. Perhaps she always wanted to write a book, or maybe she had dreams of one day owning her
own Pizza Hut (hey, it happens.) No matter the desire, the boyfriend faithfully stands by her side as the chief supporter in her pursuit of greatness.

5. He Makes Her Feel Appreciated Daily
The most impressive trait of a great boyfriend is his ability to display his appreciation daily. It could be something as small as remarking on
her how beautiful she is, or as simple as expressing his gratitude that she bought Fruity Pebbles instead of Apple Jacks this time around.
Whatever the case may be, he never takes her for granted and certainly never misses an opportunity to make her feel special.


The Fly Guy Moral: Now that I've detailed the great boyfriend essentials, allow me to break it down on even simpler terms. We could probably sit here
all day compiling a list of things that most women would like to have in a man. But in my experience, all of those traits lead back to one main ingredient.
Respect. A great boyfriend is one who not only respects himself, but also respects his woman. This respect is displayed through many of the traits that I just detailed,
as well as in the way he cherishes the relationship in general.

MY OPINION ON WHY OPRAH NEVER MARRIED, DO YOU AGREE?
OPRAH HAS A GOOD ASS MAN, THAT I KNOW WOULD LOVE TO MARRY HER BUT I DON'T THINK SHE WANTS TO GET MARRIED.


CHECK IT:


UNFORTUNATELY WOMEN WERE SEEN AS LESS THAN IN COMPARISON TO MEN WHEN SHE GREW UP SO......

FOR HER TO MARRY WOULD GIVE AWAY AT LEAST HALF OF HER UNDENIABLE, ULTIMATE POWER OVER HER LIFESTYLE AND MONEY TO HER SPOUSE.






SHE ALSO UNDERSTANDS THAT IN THE END, HER NAME WILL STAND ALONE.


AS NEEDING NO ONE TO STAND NEXT TO HER.



MOST INDEPENDENT PEOPLE FEEL THE SAME WAY.







THE INDIVIDUALS WHO ARE INDEPENDENT EMOTIONALLY, SPIRITUALLY, PHYSICALLY, MENTALLY AND FINANCIALLY NEED NO ONE TO STAND NEXT TO THEM.


SO BEING POWERFUL AND SINGLE IS PERFECT FOR THEM.


IT GIVES THEM THE FREEDOM THEY NEED.







MOST EMOTIONALLY, SPIRITUALLY, PHYSICALLY, MENTALLY AND FINANCIALLY DEPENDENT PEOPLE HATE THIS CONCEPT OF LIFE.


WHY?

BECAUSE IT'S JUST TOO SCARY TO EVEN THINK ABOUT.


LIVING ABOVE THE REQUIREMENT OF FRIENDS, LOVERS, RELATIONSHIPS, JOBS, SCHOOLS,

TOTAL INDEPENDENCE TO HAVE TOTAL CONTROL.


IT'S JUST TOO SCARY THINK ABOUT RIGHT? LOL


WHAT ARE YOUR THOUGHTS?


~KING~

Question Of The Day Is:

What would be your reaction/response if your child unexpectly came out and informed you tht he or she was either Gay or bi-sexual. Would you treat them any differently or would you embrace their new way of life ?

Title: The break down in marriage in the black/hispanic community ?


Question Of The Day Is

In your opinion, Name some of the negative factors of why most marriages fail, considering that 4 out of 5 marriages fail with the 1st 5 years?

JACKSON, Miss. - Oscar-winning actor Morgan Freeman was in a hospital in Memphis, Tenn., on Monday after being injured in a car accident near his home in Mississippi.

Regional Medical Center spokeswoman Kathy Stringer said Freeman, 71, is in serious condition. The hospital is about 90 miles north of the accident scene in rural Tallahatchie County in the Mississippi Delta.

Mississippi Highway Patrol spokesman Sgt. Ben Williams said Freeman was driving a 1997 Nissan Maxima belonging to Demaris Meyer of Memphis when the car left a rural highway and flipped several times shortly before midnight Sunday.


“There’s no indication that either alcohol or drugs were involved,” Williams said. He said both Freeman and Meyer were wearing seat belts. The woman’s condition was not immediately available.

Freeman was airlifted to the hospital in Tennessee.

Clay McFerrin, editor of Sun Sentinel in Charleston, said he arrived at the accident scene on Mississippi Highway 32 soon after it happened about 5 miles west of Charleston, not far from where Freeman owns a home with his wife.


McFerrin said it appeared that Freeman’s car was airborne when it left the highway and landed in a ditch.

“They had to use the jaws of life to extract him from the vehicle,” McFerrin said. “He was lucid, conscious. He was talking, joking with some of the rescue workers at one point.”

McFerrin said bystanders converged on the scene trying to get a glimpse of the actor.

When one person tried to snap a photo with a cell phone camera, Freeman joked, “no freebies, no freebies,” McFerrin said.

Freeman won an Oscar for his role in “Million Dollar Baby.” His screen credits also include “The Shawshank Redemption,” “Driving Miss Daisy” and “The Dark Knight,” now in theaters.

He was born in Memphis, Tenn., but spent much of his childhood in the Mississippi Delta. He is a co-owner of the Ground Zero Blues Club in Clarksdale.

The hospital where Freeman is being treated is commonly known as The Med, and is an acute-care teaching facility that serves patients within 150 miles of Memphis.

WOMAN CLAIMS SINGER CHRIS BROWN FATHERED HER 4-YEAR-OLD SON

WOMAN CLAIMS SINGER CHRIS BROWN FATHERED HER 4-YEAR-OLD SON
A young woman from virgina is claiming that 19-year-old singer Chris Brown is the father to her four-year-old son. The woman named Michelle Gasper says that she and Chris dated back when they were both 14-years-old:
VIA CELEBWOHOO:

A Local Virginia native, Michelle Gasper, a 19 year old from Tappahannock, Virginia called her local radio station Saturday morning claiming that singer Chris Brown and herself had been in a relationship for over 2 years before he signed a record deal, and released his self-titled debut album in 2005. She claimed that the two first started dating in 2003, when they were both only 14 years old. Gasper claims that the two engaged in unprotected sex numerous times, and she had agreed with Brown to acquire in an abortion before later giving birth to her now 4 year old son, Deshante Gasper in July 2004. Gasper also claimed that her relationship with Brown had persisted well during the time he first signed a record deal with the label, Jive Records in late 2004, but his mother, Joyce Hopkins insisted that he ended the relationship with Gasper, having the fear of the public knowing of him being the father of a child, which she thought would tarnish his future music career.

Gasper cried hysterically over the Essex County radio station implying that she wanted Brown to be in their 4 year old son’s life. The radio DJ, Maurice Hendricks questioned the truthfulness of Gasper’s allegations asking her why she would choose to speak out so many years later. She then replied in saying that Brown’s mother, Joyce Hopkins had been sending her money for several years to help with her son, Deshante and to also remain silent about the situation. Gasper insisted that Brown needed to play a more fatherly role in their son’s life since he was getting older, and had begun to ask questions about his father’s existence. Gasper remained on air for about 15 minutes while Hendricks continued to try to keep her calm. So far, there has been no comment from Brown’s publicist concerning these allegations. Chris Brown first entered onto the music scene in late 2005 with his hit single, “Run It”. His debut album has gone on to sell over 2 million copies in the U.S. alone.

She told me that all men lie, which initially caught me off guard. Why? Because
I'm a firm believer that women lie just as much as men do … especially when it
comes to relationships. Since neither side is faultless by any stretch of the imagination,
I decided to expose both sides for the liars that they are. Below are some of the top
lies that both men and women tell in relationships.


Three Lies That Women Tell

1. I'm Not Mad At You

Word of advice: When you hear these words, it's time to run for cover. In the middle
of an argument, when a woman feels the need to verbally say, "I'm not mad,"
her words at that point are about as believable as an R. Kelly defense witness.

2. I had sex with this_______ many guys. (fill in the blank)

Do you remember that episode of the "Cosby Show" when Vanessa was teaching Cliff new math?
Well this same formula is used by 85% of all women when calculating the number of men
they've slept with. It goes a little something like this:

Actual number of men, minus the number of men casually slept with,
minus the number of forgettable men, divided by 2. (And you thought E=MC2 was difficult to understand)

3. I don't care how much money you have.

On a very basic level, all women care about money. From the gold diggers
to the women who don't mind having their man's back, it's just a part of their DNA.
Why? Because a man's income forces a woman to make a decision. Does she date
a man that can potentially take her on a trip around the world? Or does she give
the underdog a chance…even though he probably can't afford to take her around
the block? (Hey, gas is high).

Of course, there are other variables that come into play as a woman decides who
she wants to be with. But even still, you would probably have an easier time
convincing me that Michael Jackson weighed 140 pounds soaking wet, than you
would at convincing me that a woman doesn't care about her man and his money.

Honorable Mentions:

a. I don't mind when you hang out with your friends.

b. I like your parents.

c. I won't try to change you.

d. I'm over him.

e. I'm just not ready for a boyfriend right now.

f. I don't mind paying for our dinner.

g. I don't talk to my friends about us.


Three Lies That Men Tell

1. I've never felt this way about anyone else.

We as men get caught up in the moment very easily. It's just in our nature to do so.
So when a man looks you in the eye, and tells you that he's
never felt this way about anyone else, it's not necessarily a lie. It's just that all
of the blood in his brain is focused on you, so it's hard for him to
remember any of the other experiences that he's ever had with a woman.
(Did you fall for that one


Later on, as the relationship develops, such a claim may very well be true.
But if those words come out of his mouth in the beginning stages,
then he's probably laying it on a little thick.

2. I am going to leave her for you.

Why do women still fall for this one? In a world where both men and women
are now delivering complex Playstation 3 and Nintendo Wii lies,
I just don't understand why so many women still fall for simple Atari and CalicoVision lies like this one. Here's a public service announcement:
You shouldn't deal with him until he officially leaves the other woman.
If you do a moment sooner, then he never will leave her…and that's a fact.

3. I'm Sorry.

Now this technically doesn't qualify as a lie in my book, but I will classify it as a
serious mistruth. Many times during the course of a relationship,
a man just gets tired of arguing. In fact, he would probably rather sit through
one of Jennifer Lopez's vocal lessons (very painful), than spend his
time arguing with you (even more painful.) So instead of going tit for tat with you,
many men employ this time-tested defense as a surefire way
to get out of virtually any and every disagreement. Is he really sorry?

Well that's debatable. But it does keep the peace, and allows you to return back to your regularly scheduled lives.

Just don't ask what he's sorry for…that follow up question always seems to make things worse.
Honorable Mentions:

a. She's just a friend.

b. I will never lie to you.

c. I'm ready for a commitment.

d. I promise that I'll change.

e. I haven't had sex since we broke up.

f. I'll call you right back.

g. Having sex with me will be unforgettable.

so i called my photographer i was gonna be a nice guy i said yo ... that girl did she know her shit was out i was gonna delete it ... u people werent supposed to see this his reply yes she knew but shes was selling ass ... if this is ur cousin or family member please help her ... smh